There's this feeling of exaustion that washes over you, after a long day of hanging on the phone with one's neurotic mother...
For as long as I can recall it, there was this sentence my mother used to shove into my mind - "Iniciative is punishable". In other words, you think up something for yourself, and do it, and you're gona get in deep sh...
By the age of 16, I figures that no matter what I'm dealing with, if it concerns in ANY way my mother, I'd better ask advice. There were always 80% chances, that on a question that concerns me, she'll agree with me.
Now, being 19, almost 20... she tells me I don't take enough iniciative. That I ask her twice if she's sure I should make the deposit today, and not monday, etc...

Yet, all I feel like doing, is to grab a beer, fall on my couch with it, turn on some Sinatra, and forget everything about her and her problems.
Go out on a date, have some fresh air...
Have sex, because that always manages to calm me down... tho, after this morning's fiasco, I doubt that's happening any time soon...
Guess it's gona be beer and Sinatra then.
At least, he has a sexy voice.
Maybe sit on the windowsil, look out for the sun to set down. Drink in the evening air.

I wish, there was someone to talk to, without having to bother to pretend to be someone I'm not...for once.